A Letter to Myself

 Dear Me,

I cannot expect my body to be overly muscley, stick thin, or perfectly perfect. Why should it be? Will it make more people love me? No. Will it really make me happier? Probably not. Does it really matter? Not in the long run.

The women I look up to, who I inspire to be, I inspire to be not for their thigh gap, their toned arms, or their perfect body. I look up to them for their determination, their strength, their ability to love and to laugh and to be courageous. There is no correlation between thigh gaps and courage. So I should stop treating it as though it will give me such.

The man I want to love me for eternity will not love me more for having perfectly shaped legs or a perfectly flat stomach. Because eternal love is unconditional love, and he will love me when I work out and he will love me when I gain 5 pounds. Why? Because a flat stomach doesn't give me love and respect. Because a thigh gap doesn't tell you how lovely my personality is. Because there is no correlation between love and perfect curves. So I will stop treating it as though it will give me such.

 And how sad that I should be so harsh on my own body? The body that wakes me in the morning and puts me to rest at night.
The body that cradles my soul.

So, instead of striving towards a thigh gap, or for sleek arms, or a flat six pack, I will wish for other things.

I will wish to always have legs that can carry me up into the mountains and back down to my home. I will wish for lungs that make it so I can laugh for hours and run for miles. I will wish for arms that hug perfectly and cradle little souls. I will wish for a backbone that stands straight and firm. I will wish for hands that can always paint and inspire.

Because those things create love, laughter, determination, strength and courage.

Breathe.




I deserve love--whether I'm perfect or not.
(repeatx10000)

I love you.

Love, Me

i n n e r strength.

okay, so i think we all have short term and long term goals, right? as a woman, i think it's in our nature to make a goal out of everything. whether it's about school, religion, sports, fashion, etc., we always want to better ourselves (or be better than the person next to us--yikes). which can be beneficial or really bad. highly unrealistic goals are how depression, stress, and anxiety form--but when it's a realistic goal, great things can happen. but sometimes, it's nice to just--do things without any analysis.

today i accomplished a goal i didn't even know i had. and it was unexpected and great and made me feel super good about myself. which brings me to my point--i think we don't understand all of our strengths. i think we only see a very very very small percentage of our greatness. and maybe that's because of society, or personal reasons--but whatever it is, i think it's a great thing to get rid of all that we think we know about ourselves, and just embrace that we don't know everything and run into oblivion with open arms. i think when we do that, something really really great could happen--we could learn more of what god knows we are capable and less of what we think we are.

Work Out Music

So I've been working out three times a week, way too early in the morning--like 5:30 AM. Trying to run 2-3 miles while still waking up is a little difficult. I've never really listened to music while running, but right now it's a must. And it's just a personal preference, but I really don't like the high tempo weird aerobic music, or heavy rap. I need less fast, less swearing and more of a steady pace. So what music do I listen to?
This was my playlist today--the playlist that helped me run an extra ten minutes, battle through ten minutes of intensive uphill-treadmill action, and stay awake without tipping over with exhaustion.

1. Dog Problems by The Format
It's the perfect song to start warming up--starting slow but gaining speed while keeping up the beat. It just also happens to be a really great song.

2. I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles) by The Proclaimers
Not only is this the best song in the world, it's also really great to jog to. Whenever I hear this while I'm working out it kind of makes me want to burst out into song. (You should also listen to the cover by Sleeping At Last. Not a great workout song, but a beautiful song.)

3. Everlasting Light by The Black Keys
Let me be your everlasting light
The sun when there is none
I'm a shepherd for you
And I'll guide you through
Let me be your everlasting light

4. My Generation by The Who
It's just so good.

5. Bad Kids by Black Lips
Happy songs really do make you run faster.

6. No Church In The Wild by Jay Z, Kanye West, Frank Ocean
I take back what I said about rap. Anything that's on the Gatsby Soundtrack is a-okay by me. 

7. Anything Could Happen by Ellie Goulding
This song doesn't even have that fast of a tempo, and it's not what I usually listen to, but it's the only thing that keeps me going when I feel like I'm going to die.

8. Pursuit of Happiness by Lissie
I AGAIN take back what I said about rap. Lissie does this Kid Cudi song justice and I know it swears but it's the BEST to listen to when you're jogging and trying to cool down.

9. Vagabond by Wolfmother
Oh girl I don't know all the reasons why,
I found the answer lookin' in your eye,
I go out walking all day long,
Take away this lonely man soon he will be gone,
Cause I'll tell you everything about living free,
Yes I can see you girl can you see me,

10. Cruel by St. Vincent
I found St. Vincent in my Rock in Roll History class and I've never been the same.

What are some of your favorite work out songs?